Ah, burnout. That delightful state of complete physical, emotional, and mental exhaustion that somehow feels like a rite of passage in the modern workplace.
If you’ve ever looked at your diary and think you might as well be asked to solve a Rubik’s Cube blindfolded, let me assure you: it’s not just you.
Burnout, depression, and anxiety aren’t merely the unfortunate byproducts of a hectic work schedule—they’re the end results of poor management, toxic people and sometimes ecosystems that seem more dedicated to squeezing every drop of life out of employees than fostering a healthy workplace culture.
In our Aotearoa New Zealand, where the air is fresh, the scenery breathtaking, and the coffee strong, the stigma surrounding mental health looms large. Here, discussing anything beyond the weather—let alone emotive content like anxiety or regret—can feel like stepping into a lion's den wearing nothing but a meat suit.
Recently it took nearly six months to convince a friend to see his GP about his clearly worsening mental health. He did in the end and you'll be please to hear he's in a better place now. His initial view, and that of our societal norms, dictate that we should “man up” or “just get on with it,” as if the only acceptable response to mental health challenges are a stoic grin and a caffeine-fueled sprint to the finish line.
As someone who has held senior leadership roles, particularly through the pandemic and its aftermath, I can testify that I threw my heart and soul into my work, only to be greeted with a chorus of appalling behaviors from clients, colleagues, and even those in leadership positions above me.
If there’s one thing I learned, it’s that being a “good leader” can sometimes mean serving as a punching bag for all the pent-up frustration of those around you. I received little support from those I reported to—often I felt actively undermined, as if my efforts were merely fodder for office gossip. It was a classic case of "let’s see how much we can pile on before the whole thing collapses." Spoiler alert: it did.
Burnout is not merely the fault of the beleaguered team member; it’s a collective failure. Poor leadership, toxic workplace cultures, and a general unwillingness to discuss mental health issues are the real culprits. It’s like we’re all participating in a high-stakes game of “Who Can Ignore Their Feelings the Longest?”
I rememeber clearly when during an exit interview, my boss at the time asked how long I'd been seeking a new role. I stated honestly, as is the point of an exit interview, "about a year". A look of genuine surprise betrayed a classic example poor leadership reflection. Gaslighting was next on the agenga when it was suggested I should have been more open about being unhappy.
They were right, I should have been more upfront about my emotions. But I'd argue on reflection that my burnout was clear and the responsibility lay with my employer to not vilify me during my tenure.
Here’s the kicker and it's something it takes a while to really get. Our jobs should never be our lives. They can be passions, sure, but if your 9-5 becomes your entire existence, you might want to reconsider your life choices.
Picture this: you clock out and after a long day, you're home. But the stress and fatigue cling to you like a bad smell. Suddenly, the only way you know how to unwind is to binge-watch the latest show about people living their best lives while you sit in your pajamas, feeling like a wilted plant.
What’s the antidote to this toxic brew of burnout and mental health neglect? It starts with fostering a supportive environment where colleagues, bosses, and everyone in between genuinely care about each other. Gossip, undermining, and spiteful actions are not just childish—they’re a plague that spreads quickly and leaves everyone worse off. Instead of tearing each other down, let’s build a culture of kindness, understanding, and open communication. After all, we’re all in this together—whether we like it or not.
So, let’s take better care of each other. Let’s check in on our colleagues and ensure that we’re not just coasting through the daily grind, but actually supporting one another. Because when we create a healthier work environment, we’ll not only stave off burnout, but we might also just find that our jobs can indeed coexist with a fulfilling life. And who knows? We might even enjoy the journey along the way.
As always, thanks for your eyes and your brains.
Gordy
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